Tuesday, October 9, 2012

31 for 21: Day 9 {R} Word

Retarded. ‘Tard. It’s the exact same thing. Did that have any affect on you? This is what it did to me..it made me cringe.it made me want to throw up. it made me want to cry. it made me want to yell from the top of my lungs.stop using that word. period.
What about this…”That is so retarded” this is what I heard. That is so Avery.
Or this..”I’m such a ‘tard.” this is what I heard. I’m such a Avery.
Why do we teach our kids not to say s**t, or f*k or nigger or fag..or any other bad word for that matter but we cant teach our kids not to say retard.  We have come along way in educating people not to say it but the younger kids are STILL using it. How do I know that young kids are still using it??? I had a chat with Destiny who is in 5th grade.  I asked her if she ever heard the word retard or if anyone in her class ever said r-tard for no reason. She said they say “that is so retarded” all the time. My heart literally stopped and I just wanted to cry. I have explained to her many times why we don’t say it but she cant understand why everyone else says it. They are insulting her sister and it hurts her she is way to shy to say anything to anyone about it. So they go on saying it not knowing what they are doing. When you say r-tard how do u know someone right there in front of you or someone that is listening is somehow affected by what you just said and you just hurt them with out even knowing it. I am guilty. before I had Avery I admit I said it too. I had no idea. I really did not know. I wasn’t taught any better. We as parents have a responsibility to teach our children and we are not teaching them. We need to teach them that this is a bad word to. a word that we don’t say.
Do you walk through a store and hear someone use your child's traits used synonymously with the word stupid?..I do. my husband does. my other daughters do and someday Avery will hear it. SHE WILL HEAR IT. and it is going to sting.she will come home crying. she will come home hurt.it will hurt me and I will want to go find that person and kick some serious butt..bc I know Avery wont do it. Hopefully she wont hear it from family.friends. cousins. or anybody that she loves. We wouldn’t dare say ni**er to anyone or f*g to anyone bc we know we would get our butts whooped. But yet I will have to teach her how to live in a world that uses something that is physically part of who she is as a bad word.and that sucks bc I shouldn’t have to! The diagnosis of Down syndrome comes with a diagnosis of mild to moderate mental retardation. It is a medical diagnosis! NOT a word to be thrown around lightly, used to insult yourself or others.
If you don't MEAN to insult her by saying it, then don't use it.


Sara Schliesman said...

Kristi I feel the same way about that word! I have taught my kids from day one not to use it. There is no need for it. There are other words that you can use to get your point across. My family hates it cause I flip out if they use it in front of me or my kids. You are such a wonderful, strong mom your girls are very lucky to have you. I hope all is going well with Avery after her last surgery.

Amy&Justin said...

Very well said.

Jenny said...

This has me in tears...I had a horrible experience today with the "R" word...I don't even know if I have the heart to write about it. I appreciated reading this post, I too wish everyone would take the time to teach their children about the use of this word and how it affects others.

Laura said...

Go Kristi! This post is so powerful!